A few hours ago, I was having myself a lovely chat with someone I had met on 4chan. The topic of video games inevitably came up and I was slightly surprised to learn that someone from said website did not regularly partake in the hobby. He was, however, curious as to whether or not I got harassed on a regular basis by men for being a "girl gamer."
This is obviously not the first time an inquiry of this nature has been made to me. That being said, I have begun to notice that the topic tends to incite feelings reminiscent of some traumatic event every time I'm forced to answer it. While men may often scoff and roll their eyes at the notion that women have a hard time playing games, I can assure you that it's not always a walk in the park. I should probably make it perfectly clear that I speak for myself and other gamers with the misfortune of harboring female genitalia, not "gamer girls." I honestly cannot stress this enough; I am not, nor do I wish to be acknowledged as, a "gamer girl." I am a gamer.
Simply put, it's tedious and oftentimes frustrating being female when video games are in question. It's common practice for us to hide our genders, being content with being referred to as "he" and "him" over voice chat. We claim our mics don't work well and, when probed about our personal lives, remain as vague and gender-neutral as possible. Now I know plenty of you are shaking your heads right now and thinking, "Bullshit. Every girl I know has always been treated well in the gaming community. They don't have to hide." I should clarify...
There are vast differences between female gamers and "gamer girls." The most prominent, I've noticed, is choice of character or design. Whether we're talking fighters, RPGs, or even racing games, you will notice patterns if you look closely. Do they opt for decals in lieu of engine upgrades? Have you never seen them fight with anyone other than Chun-li, even when they clearly can't play her that well? Do they play supporting classes because their boyfriend needs a healer? Take heed; if their gaming style can be referred to only as an aesthetic choice or what was recommended to be the easiest to play, I'd be hesitant to award them the title of "Gamer." Picking up a controller and playing a round of Halo with your boyfriend whenever his friends aren't around no more makes you a gamer than changing your oil every 3,000 miles makes you a mechanic.
Just so we're clear, I'm not hating on casual gamers here. Wii sports is fun and anyone who doesn't giggle like a schoolgirl when a new Pokemon game is announced has absolutely no soul. Those who follow the community heavily, however, take the title "Gamer" as a serious commitment to Mountain Dew and all things geeky. I enjoy a good game of basketball now and then but in no way consider myself an athlete. The thing I have a problem with is the fact that a female can play one Final Fantasy game and promptly fancy herself a "Gamer" because it means she can now hone in on a niche demographic and revel in the glory of being a rarity (Read: Speshul snowflake).
One thing they did get right, however, was garnering enough popularity and support from desperate males to allow them the privilege to practically get away with murder because "lol i'm a girl." They giggle in vent, flirt during raids, and make those adorable "tee hee, I don't know what I'm doing" sounds while trying to figure which buttonmash combo equates to blocking. Problem is, men have started to expect that from us. All of us. Even the ones who know how to play are almost required to behave like vapid retards if we expect to see any glorious lewt. Do you know what happens when we don't fill that role? THAT'S when we get harassed.
When women are content to play supporting classes and giggle in vent, everyone seems at ease. However, when it turns out that the fury warrior raping the dps charts is actually female, guys are suddenly much less accommodating to having women encroach on their hobby. The mage barely pulling her own weight on the damage charts is fine to have around (provided she makes up for it by flirting shamelessly with the raid leader), but having a main tank turn out to be a woman? Well, in the wise words of Philip J. Fry, "That dog won't hunt, monsignor." Care to know the trick to being the highest dps'ing death knight in your guild and never getting invited to raids? Don't flirt with anyone. You'll brand yourself the "stuck up bitch lesbian" and you'll be passed up for the giggle factory of a priest who stands in fire.
The egos of men are fragile things and they will go to any lengths to preserve them. While gender equality may be something everyone likes to claim they support in public, there are apparently some lines we still can't safely cross. Do I bat my eyelashes so he'll graciously let me play the next turn or do I hold my ground and risk being ostracized because he doesn't want to risk losing a game of Guilty Gear to a girl? At the end of the day, the most prevalent game we're playing is one of politics and, like it or not, we're still second class citizens. Personally, men can be buttmad all they damn well please; I'm still going to end up teabagging their corpse, regardless of what I do or do not actually possess between my legs.
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